Trying to let you go is proving to be the hardest thing I’ll ever have to do
Simply put I was never meant to
In our hearts connected by our soul we are one, both incapable of letting go
You feel the same it’s just difficult for you to let it show
Forever true this love I know
I watch as the gentle red burns down to my finger tips
Like memories of you that I miss
I inhale your absence like carcinogens
As your love burns my lungs again and again
Maybe all of it was just a dream
Something too good to be true but yet I still believe
Because I heard it hidden within your voice
That uncertainty in your choice
But who am I to speculate
I’m just a sucker trying to hide from fate
You are not mine and I am not yours, we are but one soul with two versions of the truth twisted and perverted
Perishing in the kingdom of our love, living separate lives together cherishing it
The daemons of a decision to stay apart
As the ghost of our love will constantly haunt our heart
A tragic past, present karmic obstacles and a future made of us
In the arms of another held together by trust
Bound throughout eternity trying to get this right
Scattered liked stars across the night
Your lips are but a mirrored reflection unlocking heaven’s gate
Slitting the wrist of time unable to escape fate
Your voice a pure light burning a hole into the innocence of love
Exposing half-truths as whole lies as we search for answers up above
And when physically there is nothing left
I know now in the end love will survive death
I’m tired and can’t sleep
Visions of you make me weak
My mind starts to run
I’m burning like a sun
But these sheets grow cold
As innocence was sold
Now your spot lies vacant
As we fall victim to complacent
When did we lose control
Because I love you more than you know
It’s your presence I yearn
As I toss and turn
Holding tight to my pillow
While thoughts of death flows in through the window
The blackness of night covers my heart
Afraid to face these dreams of dark
My eyes are heavy but refuse to shut
Loneliness to lust, memories to smut
Constantly reminded of an old friend
Can’t accept this as the end
I pace back and forth
I question my worth
I take the pictures off the wall
I dial your number but fail to call
With you I wanted to grow old and die
But it’s you keeping me awake tonight
It’s for you that I weep
And only with you can I finally fall asleep
I gave you my all and didn’t even know
As you fixed my broken heart and mended my soul
The rules were simple yet nowhere to be found
The more I tried not to, the more I kept losing ground
The more beat up and bruised I became the more attention form you I gained
So I kept running from you into them in an attempt to keep these desires contained
You clouded my judgment with thoughts of me deserving more
Made me question myself and over analyze what it is I kept looking for
You drained my lack of self-esteem and made me take a stand
But I knew what we had so for you to know was never part of any plan
As every time someone came through that door I would turn around and leave
And as the performers would exit stage left I would set the table like a notion preconceived
But illusions of a mirrored reflection of an image tricked the heart to seal my fate
I knew already from the beginning that I would always be too late
But regardless we had something that most people will never find
Something so pure that we couldn’t even comprehend its true value in our own minds
But a seed planted by misguided intentions
Corrupted the innocents of the bond as we both lost the ability of discretion
Now covered in guilt the pain eats away like cancer
Left to questions all these unwanted answers
Spent a life time trying to fix broken things
Only to realize that you knowingly went out of your way to fix me
With an arsenal of words at my dispense I still lack the knowledge to keep us from falling apart
So I chose to illuminate to you those feelings that grew roots in the dark
As the dust settled from the lives that collided, it was your face burning like desire in my vision
Out of all the canceled shows it was only your script I sought for revision
Because your heart is the one heart that I cannot bare to live without
Even with a future that has no route
It’s a set of forbidden lips that I long to miss
That holds the essence of our friendship
But I poured out my heart and you didn’t even blink
Now afraid to talk I fear what it is of me you must think
So I keep my words to myself and try to just stay away
Because no matter how I write the story it’s never going to change the way you look at me today
In a park car I’m traveling
Can’t even look at you I’m dreaming
All the things you could never see
Offering everything you never wanted from me
Talks of settling is gibberish
I’m tired of running so unselfish
So go forth with our dreams
I’m sorry for pestering you with these childish things
The weight of it all has been pushing tight on my chest
Now I can breathe and my heart can finally rest
I walk you to your door as if to say goodbye
But how can I ever rid you out of my life
